don’t apologize

You know those people that say “I’m sorry” way too much? That’s me. I apologize for no reason at all. If you cut me off in line leaving church, oops! That was obviously my fault. I’m sorry I didn’t let you out. If you bump into me in the hallway and make me drop everything in my hands, wow, I’m such a clutz! Why don’t I have a stronger grip? I’m sorry. Oh, you’re breaking up with me for the third time in a span of sixth months? I’m sorry. It must be all my fault.

Literally. I am not kidding when I say that I have apologized for those very things. I’m sure that you’ve apologized for various stupid things as well.

As this new year has already begun to bring its challenges, I am challenging myself and you to start to not apologize. That’s right, don’t apologize. I find myself saying sorry for things that are not even my fault. I say sorry for things that I cannot help. This year, I’m going to learn how to assess the situation. I’m going to see all viewpoints. I’ll learn how to step in the other person’s shoes. I’m going to stand strong in my arguments. I’m not going to belittle myself, my thoughts, or my opinions. I’m not going to be blinded by love. {the only love that I will be blinded by is the Father’s} I’m not going to apologize to make situations better for the temporary. I’m going to learn how to tell it like it is. I won’t hold my tongue if it helps someone realize the harshness of their personality. Truth trumps all else. Sometimes, the truth is hard to hear and it is hard to accept, but in order to remain humble, we need a dose of reality and we need a dose of Christ.

I want people to tell me how it is too. Even if it hurts. I would rather my pride be taken down a few notches in order to be humble than walk around with a puffed up chest acting like a know-it-all. (And I know my fair share of those, too.) I don’t want people to apologize to me when it isn’t necessary. A little bit of sympathy goes a long way. Too much, however, can end up hurting the person who needs to move on past a person or a situation. If I’m crying too much over a stupid boy, tell me. Tell me to get over it. Tell me there are other fish in the sea. And hopefully, I’ll listen. If not then, but soon enough. Sometimes we just have to suck it up and get over it. In the end, we’ll be made stronger because of it.

In conclusion, don’t apologize just because you feel like it. Don’t apologize in order to make situations easier if you know you should be speaking up. Speak up and speak the truth. Don’t apologize for who you are. Don’t apologize for your beliefs. Don’t apologize for your opinions. Don’t apologize for your feelings.

“He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” Micah 6:8 (ESV)


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